Hello friends,Some of you may remember a post I wrote a while back about Chew, the fancy restaurant that I opened in Seattle last year. What a difference a year makes. All was going well with it until the economy took a nosedive. Nowadays, the only people stopping by are the ones who just want to use the restroom. It's that bad. Apparently, $30 rutabaga-bison skewers are not on the top of everyone's wish list in 2009. So I've decided to switch gears and transform the place into something with broader appeal.
Welcome to Crabapples, a new family-friendly restaurant that caters to the budget-conscious, fashion-averse, suburban customer. We feature giant plates of medium-quality food at rock-bottom prices; who could possibly resist that? But the fun doesn't stop there. Wednesday is family night, when we give each kid a free paper sombrero and a crayon. And don't forget to bring your swimsuit, since every Crabapples has its own indoor water slide!
Here are a few selections from our extensive menu:
Senor Juan's Fajita Trough- your own personal trough filled with grilled meat, peppers, onions, and guacamole. No utensils needed. You keep the trough! $8.99
Desert Bloomer- we take a whole artichoke, dip it in chipotle-cornmeal batter and deep-fry it, and serve it to you with a honey-mustard dipping sauce. It's party time! $8.99
Do-It-Yourself Tacos- we bring you a head of lettuce, ground beef, a block of pepperjack cheese, and two taco shells. You make 'em, you eat 'em! $8.99
Cap'n Vinnie's Spaghetti Bar- all-you-can-eat pasta, our very own Ragin' Red sauce, and 30 different kinds of meatballs to choose from: Jamaican Jerk, Beefy Masala, Thai Turkey, and more! $8.99
Katrina Burger- 3/4 pound beef patty, lettuce, tomato, pepperjack cheese, all on a toasted ciabatta bun and "drowned" in our signature Nawlins whiskey BBQ sauce. It'll rock you like a hurricane! $8.99
Bangers 'n Hash- a southwestern take on a British classic: four jumbo hot dogs covered with bacon-jalapeno hashbrowns and topped with sour cream and pepperjack cheese. Spicy! $8.99
Kids menu- choice between tater tots or PB&J sandwich. $8.99
Who knew that eating out could be so much fun? Remember, you're always one of the family at Crabapples!
2 comments:
You are a bitter, bitter man! You are the Grinch of the culinary universe! Pricing each dish at $8.99: ouch! It's funny, because it's true ...
I could be weary from the road, but I don't think I "get" this post?
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